


Before the Dawn

by SomeoneFromHeLL



Category: Loveless
Genre: Alternate Universe, Blood and Gore, Hurt/Comfort, Mental Health Issues, Multi, Mystery, Psychology, Tragedy, Unhealthy Relationships, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-13
Updated: 2018-09-13
Packaged: 2019-07-11 19:51:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15979262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SomeoneFromHeLL/pseuds/SomeoneFromHeLL
Summary: Soubi wakes up in Septimal Moon infirmary with mingled memories, while his former sensei seems to be involved in a gruesome incident and Ritsuka's nowhere to be found. As the time ticks closer to the dreadful tragedy, only the light of the dawn can help Soubi survive the upcoming. AU





	Before the Dawn

"Do you know where you are? Do you recognize me? Do you know what happened to Ritsu-sensei?"

A voice kept echoing and consuming his mind, his memories were blurry. Soubi thought he didn't even had any to begin with, so those questions asked of him seemed nonessential, how could have Soubi answered them? He was preoccupied with the need to drink, hence calm his aching throat.

"Soubi-san! Can you hear me?" A disquieted manly voice bothered the young man yet again.

The blonde moaned in an attempt to see through the fog clouding his vision. No use. He tried to utter, beg that dark apparition for water. Though opening his jaw seemed harder than before, his lips quivered, releasing a pitiful wail.

"Soubi-san answer me!" The voice paused, then suddenly became desperate, calling out.

"Soubi-san! Damn! I need a nurse here! He's losing consciousness again!"

Those words were the last thing the blonde comprehended. And soon every sound seemed dull, his eyelids felt too heavy to stay open. Soubi faded once again... Into a dreamless, deep sleep...

A piano. A few high notes played without any structured continuance. No, the artistic individual hadn't wish to compose a light blessed harmony to charm his audience or to relieve his musical seed. Those were just ludicrous, mystical sounds penetrating the dark abyss.

Soubi listened to the odd sounds without a following pattern, keeping his eyes shut. The man felt anxious, because he could not understand was it reality or just a simple reverie that struck his mind all of a sudden?

He tried to ignore the hateful noise, that rang in his ears. Although his subconscious mind felt sympathy and longed for it to continue with all of its will. It disallowed the silence to creep in. As if the quiet was… Death?

Well, that's how he perceived his emotions.

The melody suddenly got a darker tone to it, adding more and more low notes. This caused Soubi to shiver as if struck by a cold breeze. Soon he noticed imagery trying to bloom in his head. Those were sightings-memories originated from the melody.

The blonde frowned, those images flew through his head like flies, prohibiting to get caught by his mind and analyzed. Soubi felt so lost, out of place, the imaginations ran and ran according to the music's rhythm. He felt so tired, annoyed, maybe even depressed, he just wished for it to stop so the blonde could recollect his mind.

No. the hideous music kept playing ceaselessly…

"Stop it. Please stop it. I'm begging you. Stop it!" The blonde repeated those words like a mantra, probably to keep sane. Nevertheless it didn’t pause for even a pitiful second. And with every sentence, every word or syllable fading away into answerless pit of nothingness Soubi's voice got more distressed, louder... Insane. That's how his last gibberish sounded like:

" Stop! Kill out... I'm sorry, I'm sorry I’m sorry... Absolve my sins, absolve my sins... Absolve. Please, I'm begging. Kill!" The man started gritting his teeth, his words becoming meaningless mutter, harshly swallowed and crunched by the never fed greedy dark.

"Soubi-san..."

A tired voice echoed from before. This utterance permitted the darkness to burst out in a murderous fight between it and the furious brave light. Fortunately the latter won – Soubi’s eyelids tore an opening, as his eyes still trying to adapt to the new environment. 

Now. Just at this moment Soubi noted, that he was laying in an infirmary bed, an IV tucked to his left arm and other machines to his chest. The man was in a white room that reeked of thick antiseptic smell, he urged to cough. Soubi slowly turned his head to the IV, which safely penetrated his skin, there the blonde noticed a horrible sight. Though his body felt too weak to at least shiver, talk about yell.

The inner part of his elbow was covered with needle pricks as if thousand bees had stung him in one place. The flesh was swollen and covered with crimson blood. The male released a poor wail, while trying to recall from where did he got those marks and why was he in an infirmary anyway? Who brought him here?

"You're finally awake?"

Soubi gently turned his head at the tall middle aged man, sitting on chair beside him. The older male wore his dark shoulder length hair in a low ponytail. He had a piercing just below the right eye and some facial hair, while wearing a white long sleeved shirt. The weird companion glanced at him then, studying his movements, though after a minute he emitted a sigh with relief and pulled back with a smile playing on his face.

"Oh. You don’t recognize me." The male spoke in a quiet and smooth voice. "Kunugi Takehito. I’ m a member of Septimal Moon and a temporary headmaster of the Seven Voices academy."

Oh? So Soubi unconsciously traveled all the way to Goura? Why? Was Ritsuka somewhere near? Maybe he could ask him what was happening?

"Ah. I..."Soubi stammered silently with a dry throat. Still wondering which question to choose out of the million spinning in his head.

"Yes, Soubi-san?" Kunugi nodded, scrutinizing the unreasonable shivering of Soubi's left arm." Say have you ever had parkinson in your left arm?" ( Parkinson-a degenerative disorder of the central nervous system)

"No." Soubi cocked an eyebrow.

"You do now!"

"W-what! But how?!" the young male exclaimed, as his eyes went bloodshot.

"That was a joke. You don’t need to get that upset." Kunugi giggled loudly then, tapping his knee.

Soubi's eye twitched. What kind of joke was that? The blonde nearly fainted out of fright.

"Ehm... Kunugi-san..." Soubi began again, after clearing his voice. Finally he attempted to ask the hurtful questions, that his mind urged to know the answer to.

"Please, don’t call me that. I'm not your boss or something superior." Kunugi interrupted, letting out a tired breath. After a minute of silence he hissed unsavory." Just Takehito. Kunugi... it's like you are referring to my father."

The blonde gazed in annoyance. That information was not necessary, maybe even impolite. Soon he poured out stammering.

"Listen, Takehito-san. Do you know where is Ritsuka? Loveless - Ritsuka."

Kunugi Takehito suddenly got up from the chair, instead of replying. He quickly strode to the window and layed his hands on the windowsill, gently whistling. He smoothly ditched Soubi's question.

"Kunugi!" The blonde snapped after a moment. "Answer me!"

"It's Takehito, sorry what was the question?" The dark haired male side-glanced, cocking an eyebrow in the process.

Soubi stared angerly. Was this guy a total idiot he got stuck with?... Or a person, who could keep secrets and unwanted conversations from reaching the day of light?

"Listen, Soubi-san, I know one thing, you came here without Loveless."

"What, really? T-then why would I come here alone!" Soubi almost jumped out of bed and Kunugi Takehito grabbed him, holding by the shoulders. This way he kept the weak man from getting out of bed. Soubi harshly moaned in pain and finally layed back down, against his will.

“Easy there. You should lay in bed a day or two." Takehito stated, sitting back on his chair and stretching his hands above his head for no reason.

"I- I have so many questions I dont. Even. K-know where to begin… I don’t understand a thing. I can't remember anything..."

" Everything will come in time. Now it's time for you to rest, Soubi-san." The dark haired male mused with a tired voice, whilst he rummaged through his jeans pocket. Eventually he got out a key, drawing up from his seat. "Okay, I’ll be on my way now!" He said enthusiastically, spinning the key on his right index finger by the key hold.

Right at that instant Soubi snatched Takehito's arm.

"Wait, Takehito-san. My guess you aren't a staff member of the nursery, correct? So why have you come here in the first place?"

"Oh good point!" the raven haired man giggled, suddenly facing Agatsuma, meanwhile running a hand through his hair. "I dont know if this is the time to tell you this?"

"Say it, don't leave me in the dark."

"Dont think about it too much. We don’t know the details of that event ourselves."

"What happened?" Soubi swallowed, his pupils shrinking. An incident most likely occured in Septimal Moon. What exactly happened? If he could believe this Kunugi person, then Ritsuka should not have been caught in it. Even so, this mortal, if he could so easily befog a conversation or conceal the desired truth, Soubi could not trust him for a second. What kind of secret had to be hidden even within Septimal Moon headquarters?

Suddenly a terrible idea flashed through Soubi's head. He heaved out quietly, not showing the dark emotions and memories flooding in his mind, just as he just remembered the bastard's name- Ritsu-sensei.

That's it, if the man wanted to know the truth, he had to seek the help of his former teacher. Because the blonde couldn't stand being in the shadows, when his memories reached only prior to last month. Soubi had a whole blank month of no recollection. He hated and could not stand even thinking about Ritsu. And now he will meet him in order to cognize the unexplained, mysterious events happening behind his back...

"Ah, Kunugi-san..." Soubi called the raven haired man, as the latter stood at the door.

"I told you to call me Takehito!" The middle aged male snapped, not turning around. The unexpected atrocious yelling rendered shivers to go down Soubi's entire spine.

"I-I’m sorry..." The blonde stammered, feeling confounded. This time he called his companion by his given name, prolonging every syllable of it." Takehito-san, could you tell me where is Ritsu-sensei?"

"Ritsu..." Takehito whispered, cutting the last part into a silent murmur, trying to hide some facts again in all likelihood.

"I heard you! Answer me!"

He shuddered, but stayed quiet putting his palm on the handle then tapping his fingers to it. He was stonewalling once more. Soubi got sick of that behavior pretty quick. In so he snarled, while putting his hands on the edge of the bed in order to get up.

"Takehito-san, stop stalling, answer where is that damned Ritsu!? I'm getting up anyway. So tell me now gently or say it to my face when I'm gonna kick you to that wall!"

That was Soubi's last straw of self-control and this masked imposter cut it.

Silence. Was the tall-tongued man using it to his twisted game? 

"Don’t get up you should not walk yet." Takehito eventually muttered, hiding his eyes from the other.

"Then...You know what I want," Soubi gave the middle-aged man a glare."Takehito-san."

Kunugi ruffled his hair with his fingers again, then quickly shook his head, as if still debating If it would be reasonable thing to tell Soubi, what happened.

"Minami Ritsu is..." He paused, checking the clock, but then he heared Soubi purposely cough to get his attention." As I was saying, he’s in rehabilitation."

"W-what did you said?"

"Yes, in Septimal Moon's private hospital's joint."

'W-we have that here?' Soubi thought, while his body unconsciously shivered, as an unexplained ache evoke in his stomach. Was he that afraid? 'Why am I even worried that much for the asshole? I shouldn't!' That thought didn't calm him down one bit.

"The accident took place a few days ago, when someone assaulted the principal in the backyard. We haven’t yet found the culprit." Kunugi explained with a calm voice like it was something that happensed every day...

Surely, psychotic killers roaming in a private closed areas, stabbing not anyone, but the head of the school (what loot!). Yes, that can be seen any time of the hour... Nothing special...

"Nana found him heavily bleeding from three wounds and brought him in. Thank god those weren’t fatal."

Soubi let out a heavy breath out of his lungs. Okay, that meant he's alive, good to know, the blonde hadn't wished death to anyone. Even to someone as loathsome as Ritsu-sensei.

"The problem started to occur when Minami woke up. Ritsu had the symptoms of being wounded mentally: he didn't talk about that event; most of the time spoke in gibberish, not controlling his intake of air. He often passed out from concealing his breath, when he would begin to speak." The blonde bit his bottom lip harder with every symptom Kunugi spilled out. "That's why Minami's being locked up where it would be safe for him. And I took his place as the momentary headmaster!" The dark haired man seemed proud of that. He kept his hands on his hips, while staring at the ailing Soubi with sparkles in his eyes.

"Aright, I understand," Soubi nodded, keeping his gaze down. "So, Takehito-san. what was your purpose?"

"My purpose? For what?"

"For visiting me. You didn't come here just out of free time to say hello I assume." Soubi droned without any emotions in his voice.

The oldermale snapped his tongue in irritation then. He soon srode back at the ailing man with an annoyed face. Soubi didn't gave in and shot him a glare back.

"What? If I'm a nuisance you shouldn't have gone here in the first place."

"Soubi-san, I’m here to investigate the accident."

"Eh?" The blonde motioned to himself in disbelief, then bursted out in what seemed a frantic laughter."Hahaha. You’re suspecting me?! Well, should have known you came here with a reason."

"You may not remember-you, Soubi-san," Takehito folded his arms over his chest, slightly leaning his head at the shoulder. "Were closely living with Minami for a few weeks now."

"Excuse me," Soubi frowned, as a displeased groan escaped at the hideous name just mentioned. "I think you’re mistaken. I haven’t seen Ritsu-sensei in years."

"Your memories are still blurry. We know better."

Damn. No arguing about that. Soubi felt unneasy, disturbed. This memory lacking, not knowing where he had been or done was seriously creepy and shocking. It was as if a whole different entity borrowed his life, returning it to Soubi after more than a month just so that Soubi would clean up the mess, he had no knowledge of… What was even more putting Soubi on the edge, was this mysterious bloodshed. If Soubi had been with Ritsu, why couldn't he had protected his sensei? What happened back then? Likewise why had the blonde abandoned Ritsuka in the first place? The more Soubi knew the more questions he had...

This dumbfounded state he woke up in was driving the young man insane... Soubi suddenly nearly yanked back out of the bed when a cold strong arm grasped his palm.

"Soubi, patience. You'll know soon enough." Takehito ordered firmly. It seemed he noticed the other’s worries, or were they too obvious to begin with?

For the next few minutes the light-haired male stared into space, his jaw fallen. He did not respond anymore, this was too much to absorb into the "freshly-washed" brain...

Just when Kunugi Takehito stood inches away from the doorframe, an idea invaded, penetrating Soubi's head. The blonde couldn't quiet the burning desire to keep it shut. The question spun around without fading. This also allowed Soubi to recall that weird dream that he had a few hours ago. There was no way to make them cease… The momories, the melody, god, even the exact thoughts replayed again, mixing with one another like a broken casette player. No, such vivid mental representation could not be just a reverie. Have somebody played that discord lacking piece somewhere, that Soubi could hear?

And if every melody every tune and note had an idea, that they wanted to represent, a story to tell, a plotted place that cannot be changed in the note sheet in order to achieve a musical perfection. Then... what was the meaning of that eardrum-killing racket?

"Piano..." Soubi wailed out, still studying, that dream.

"Huh?"

"Oh. I'm sorry. Guess I was just deep in my thoughts..." Soubi apologised, waving a hand. He hoped to clear his mind from that hideous racket. He didn’t needed Takehito’s intervention with it all… Although his inner mind craved for the knowledge desperately… In so, Soubi began to sort out his thoughts in to words, timidly. "Have… Were you the one, who played the piano a few hours before?"

Kunugi stood frozen, with shrunk pupils, after another minute of silence, he called through the door.

"Nurse! Another dose please..."

Soubi layed down, watching as a pink haired girl, with cat ears, filled a needle.

" What is this?" The blonde looked wary, probably because of all those unexplained pricks in his arm.

"Stay still." the nurse ordered, Kunugi watched from the side. Just then Soubi noticed a smirk going down his face hidden behind a palm and eyes like a hawk.

"Wait!" Soubi panicked snatching his arm from the teenager nurse." I demand to know for what purpose are these medications."

"You do not need to know." The nurse replied bluntly. "Give me your arm."

"Kunugi!" The blonde yelled, while struggling to get his hand free once again.

To Soubi's relief his cold faced, raven haired companion, tapped toward him. Although the blonde’s timid smile quickly turned into a petrified look. Takehito pinned Soubi down, holding by the chest.

"Continue."

" Wait, Kunugi , what are you doing?" Soubi screeched, still fighting to release his hand from the tight hold. "Stop it! No!"

The needle moved closer to the elbow.

"Nooo!" Soubi began trashing on the bed and suddenly felt a hand tightly cover his mouth the man released a pitiful moan in response.

Kunugi stared at Soubi's shaking body, while biding his quivering mouth with gloomy eyes, bitting his lip in annoyance. He hissed leaning near Soubi's frightened face.

The pink haired teen finally forced the needle in Soubi's inner part of the elbow, that was already dyed in crimson blood. The blonde ejected another harsh moan from his lungs as the liquid filling the syringe leaked out into Soubi's blood vessel. The two people standing above him receded.

The vision slowly blurred at a point where Soubi could not even make out the faces of the two people gazing at him. Which one was Kunugi now?

After a minute the medication finally took effect, Soubi got sleepy and now it seemed that three ghostly apparitions stood just after the bed. Who were they? What did they want from him? One if those appearances took a step closer, standing near his face. What did he want? Who was that person?

Suddenly the male brooding next to him took shape: first the silver hair neatly cut above the shoulder, glasses hiding those blue eyes- there was no mistaking him...

"S-sensei ?" Soubi whispered poorly, his eyelids lacking strength to stay open.

The blonde gave in to sleep, dragging him back to that once known place- the greedy blackout... the mystical melody... The murderous silence, the madness of it all. This was his home now... Soubi had nowhere to go anymore, hence nothing to fight the reverie for... The blonde had nothing. He was never destined to achieve happiness... Hadn’t sensei always taught him to obey, erasing his free will? Didn’t Seimei branded Soubi as a property? So why was he fighting the darkness, wanting to come back to the treacherous infirmary? No one waited for his arrival. No one needed a broken and damaged tool… Seimei left him, Ritsu did as well. Ritsuka was gone, did he got tired of Soubi finally?

Those fluttering rose petals, the calming sound of chirping birds, a river going down near, the grass tickling his knees underneath and love of another mortal - this felicity had been forbidden...

Soubi had no one and nothing to call his own, to call dear. No, he had nothing. So if he wasn't welcome by the light, why not give in to the darkness waiting for him with outstretched arms? Why not let the psychopathy pour on him, while grinning as the insanity poison his mind at the point where it was the last thing he saw? Render it as his dear home. Laugh while radiating with joy. “I’m home now!" Bestowing it, feeding the yearning silence and let it answer "Welcome back!"

Yes, if heaven was prohibited, why not live in hell disguising it with lies or sick beliefs of a perfect home?

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, fellow readers this is the first fixed chapter of a huge multi chapter, that I had been working for ages, reviews and critique are welcomed! I Should be posting the second chapter some time around. Oh and Takehito's my OC, I just took a surname form the loveless fandom, since we have no other information about that character, except for the shirt mention, so yea... Hope you enjoyed and good day!  
> inspiration: Diary of Dreams - the valley;  
> A life divided - feel;


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